We have all had those moments where planning a date with our husband seems like too much work. We have kids to take care of, a house that is in constant need of cleaning, errands to keep the house running smoothly, and we just want some peace and quiet (or better yet a shower that is not interrupted) mixed in there. But there is one thing that I remind myself of ALL THE TIME:
You are a sexy, beautiful lady.
I have to put this photo up to remind myself of this. You were a sexy woman before Cheerio’s became your new hair accessory, song lists didn’t include Baby Shark, bottle service had a whole different meaning, and leggings and a messy bun were not the go-to necessity to survive the day. And you’re still a sexy woman today.
Your partner adores you and wants your attention. So go out and spend time with your spouse and reconnect.
Hear me out on this. We all have been there; when we do get the chance to go on a date night or have an open weekend, we forget to do it because we get caught up doing the errands we couldn’t finish, housework, and have kids’ games to attend. As a wife to a husband in the medical field (and an unpredictable job), I come home after working a full day, take care of our daughter and the dogs, and continue nesting the house for our new baby girl. I could keep going with the list, and I’m sure you could, too.
But let’s be honest: those are all excuses.
A date night can be anywhere from 1 to 3 hours, but that time can be the best time you and your partner need to reconnect. If you put something on a schedule and become aware of your free time, we can begin to “build the lives we want in the time we’ve got” as Laura Vanderkam says in her TedTalk.
So what is the solution to carve out this special time?
Create a Date Night Box!
Having a date night box is a physical and tangible item that you and your partner can see and remind you to schedule a date night. Plus, you already have a planned date ready for you! I planned everything out for the full year, so that way we have an idea 3 months in advance (typically when my husband starts scheduling out his work schedule) and we know what weekend we can plan a date.
When I created the date night box, I planned for two different types of dates: an at-home date and a date out on the town. An at-home date is easy to put together and budget-friendly, while an out on the town date is fun for exploring the city and getting out of your routine a bit.
Once we roughly knew the date schedule, I made 24 cards with all the details of the date stuffed into an envelope. Feel too busy to schedule all dates at once? You could do 2-4 dates at a time, or whatever you feel you can accomplish in advance. And mix up the date ideas; some can be just for you and your husband, other can be adult group dates or with the whole family.
Date ideas could include sports or other active fun, trying new foods, community involvement, or something you’ve never done before but always wanted to try.
Each date night envelope includes the following:
- The description of the date
- The location of the date to take place
- Picture or logo of the location
- Cash, gift card or certificate to help cover the cost of the date or for the babysitter.
Here is how my date night box turned out. Some of my dates include:
- Mini Golf Challenge
- Nerf Gun Wars
- Triple Ax Group Competition
- Gourmet S’mores Night
- Pi Day / Make Your Own Pizza Night
You can also find more unique date night ideas around Fargo here!
As for finding a babysitter for the date, look to your community for help. Some places I have found sitters are:
- Neighbors (you can do a trade, you go out for a night then you take their kids for a night)
- Daycare / School Caretakers
- Babysitter websites
- Family in town
- Family that is visiting (you know they would love spending alone time with your kids, and everyone gets to be spoiled)
- High school or college students
- Recreation Center: Family Wellness Center or the YMCA offers the Parents Night out or Parents Day out. Pre-registration is requested and usually open for non-members, just ask.
The possibilities are endless. The important thing is that you take the time to date your spouse. I’d love to hear your local date night ideas! Let the sparks fly!